LAUREL’S KITCHEN CORNER: GEORGE WASHINGTON’S STOVED POTATOES AND MUTTON CHOPS (3 SEPTEMBER 2010)
There is the merest hint of an autumnal nip in the air. To reflect the changing seasons, I’ve found this 200 year old recipe which was supposed to have been served to George Washington for Christmas dinner in 1776. Serves 8-10 (halve the recipe for 4 people).
• 10 medium potatoes
• 2 cups thick cream (you could substitute crème freche)
• 3 pounds thinly sliced mutton chops
• Pepper
• 3 cups minced onions
• Salt to taste
• 2 tablespoons butter
Peel and slice potatoes. Place 1/3 of the potatoes in greased Dutch oven or large casserole; pour half the cream over potatoes. Arrange ½ of the mutton chops over potatoes; sprinkle with salt. Repeat layers, ending with potatoes; dot with butter. Bake in preheated 300-325F oven for 1½ - 2 hours or until potatoes are tender.
WELLNESS COACHING OR WELLNESS THERAPY? (1 SEPTEMBER 2010)
Coaching is seen as present and future orientated. You’ve got a problem. Let’s find a solution and implement it. The emphasis is on goals. Counselling is seen as present and past orientated. You’ve got a problem. Let’s find out how the past affects the present. The emphasis is on exploration.
Increasingly I’m seeing coaching and counseling skills dovetailing in the field of wellness.
We might define wellness as an eclectic blend of fitness, community integration, management of physical conditions, nutrition, relationship, play, work and environment. If these are the external building blocks of wellness, then your mindset is the internal foundation for wellness. How you experience your external wellness is determined by your internal machinations.
By mindset, I mean your attitude towards your emotional and mental processes and your attitude towards wellness and sickness.
Ideally both coaching and the use of counseling skills are organic in nature. Although goals might be set, loosely or otherwise, the pathways of getting there will deviate and change to reflect the client’s inner processes.
Wellness coaching is outcome orientated. However, sometimes there are barriers to change within a client that hinders then from moving forward and these barriers have their roots in the past. Working compassionately with a client can help them explore and release, so that they can move forward. Having said this, there are times when a client isn’t psychologically ready to move into an outcome-based solution. At times like these, in-depth counselling is required and not wellness coaching.
However with a client who is “coaching-ready”, a blend of sensitive coaching and counseling skills could facilitate the movement of a client more appropriately to a meaningful and more lasting place of action.
These thoughts have been inspired by a new book contract I’m working on - how to integrate wellness coaching into an existing therapeutic practice. Lots of ideas for taking wellness coaching into the 21st century coming (I hope).
MY TIPS FOR LOWING CHOLESTEROL (30 AUGUST 2010)
A year ago I was diagnosed with high cholesterol. 4 months later, after going on a low-fat diet, putting myself on a plant supplement, I lost a stone and my cholesterol had dropped from 7.8 to 5.6. Here are some of the low fat choices I enjoyed then (and still do now):
BREAKFAST
• Oatabix or Special K with semi-skimmed milk or low fat, pro-biotic yoghurt
MAIN MEALS
• Lean meat (chicken, turkey, duck or diced lamb) with veg, brown rice, salad or stir fry (with olive oil)
• Mackerel, salmon or sardine with jacket potato, brown rice or stir fry
• Fish or lean meat pie topped with mashed potato (no butter) and side serving of veg or salad
• Baked beans in a jacket potato (zilch fat!)
• Heinz ravioli
SNACKS
• 2 slices of wholegrain bread, Dutch crispbreads, matzos, oat cakes or ryvita with Flora Pro-Active spread with red roasted pepper humus, mackerel pate, phili lite or cottage cheese
• Fruit: blueberries, guava, whole fruits, cantaloupe, oranges, blackberries, apples, strawberries, papaya, banana, prunes, grapes, plums, raspberries, dried fruit such as figs, dates, apricots, currants, raisins
• Chopped banana on 2 oatcakes or ryvita
• For the crisp attack (of which I have many as you might gather from this blog - it's the salt I think): Ryvita Minis, twiglets, pretzels, Marmite rice cakes
• Red roasted hummus with crudities
• Soups: Weight Watchers, Baxters Lentil & Bacon soup, Big Soup (or home-made)
• Live yoghurt
• Suchi
SWEET STUFF
• 5 sponge fingers (look just like bonios!)
• Mrs Crimble’s Dutch Apple Cake (wheat, dairy and egg free – seriously sticky and yummy)
• Fruit jelly
• 2 fingered kit kat
• Ambrosia low fat Devon creamed rice
• 4 jaffa cakes (way to go!)
• Small chocolate Turkish delight
• Liquorice
• Pro-biotic low fat yoghurt
• Sorbet
• Small tin of fruit in own juice
• Fresh fruit salad
• Meringue and fruit
I did find that because my fat intake had dropped, constipation was a bit of an issue, so I now include 1 teaspoon of flaxseed oil before I go to bed. Urgh – but it does the trick.
THE NEED FOR FUN (27 AUGUST 2010)
Having had quite a serious time of it lately, I realized yesterday how short I am on the fun stakes. Last night, we had a bottle of wine and an extremely unhealthy take away (I’m sure they sole shoes with those long bits of lamb kebab!). It was great. It was fun. It was a mindless, not important, let it go, delicious waste of time. It was fun.
Life can get serious. Sometimes it has to get serious. The trouble is, we can get stuck in the seriousness and that’s not good for mind, body or soul in the long-term. Our nose can be so close to the grindstone, we can’t see anything else. Then we get stale, resentful, and even rebellious. When this happens, we need to change our perspective and activity. To have some fun. I remember running an “Inner Child” workshop with several adults years ago. The day was profound and deep. In the afternoon, we heard an ice cream van outside. So there we were - queuing up to get our twirlies and iced lollies like a bunch of 8 year olds! Fun.
How do you define fun? Behaving in a spontaneous child-like way? Doing something madcap? Taking the day off? Doing nothing but daydreaming, walking and sleeping? If you haven’t had any fun for a week, that’s too long sunshine. Make time this weekend for some fun! We live in Brighton and something Mick and I did years ago which we fancy for silliness this weekend is being a Brighton tourist for a day – fish and chips, the pier and paddling in the sea. I might see you down there - ?
FULL MOON (25 AUGUST 2010)
Yesterday was a full moon. Each month, we get a dark moon and two weeks later is a full moon. A full moon is when the moon's illuminated side faces the earth and appears to be completely illuminated by direct sunlight. This means that the earth, sun, and moon are nearly in a straight line, with the earth in the middle.
The power of the full moon lasts from 3 days before the full moon, the day of the full moon, and the 3 days after the full moon. The power is strongest at the point the full moon, which can happen during the day.
The full moon is said to represent the fullness and abundance of the Mother aspect of the Triple Goddess (the Maiden represents the new moon, the Mother the full moon and the Crone the dark moon). The full moon is the divine feminine at the height of her creative powers and is the time of births and deaths - more of these happen at the full moon than at any other time of the lunar cycle.
The surge of energy at the full moon allows you to take action following the setting of dark moon intentions two week prior. A full moon action might involve you taking one step through a symbolic action. It is the time for releasing the things in your life that you no longer need and setting the action for what you do want. You could for example, write on a sheet of paper those things you are releasing or wish to change, and then burn the sheet.
The full moon for August is called the Sturgeon Moon according to Robert Thomas's Old Farmers Almanac (founded in 1792) because it is sturgeon season in certain parts of the world. This is the month to give thanks not only to the God/Goddess/Great Spirit but to yourself too. Set this moon-time aside for pampering yourself and your family.
Extra!!!! Women's bodies at the full moon are in the ovulation stage (in menstruating women whose cycles began at the new moon). This is fertility and sexuality at its height. Go for it!
SETTING YOUR INTENT FOR THE WEEK (23 AUGUST 2010)
Today is the start of a new week. What is your intent for the week ahead? Here’s a snick of insight into mine:
Work: To do my regular blog posts. To make a start on my new book. To give good service to my clients and students. To cast a brain cell or two over some website development.
Social: To see a friend for lunch on Wednesday. To prepare for seeing my mum over the week-end. To phone my sister after seeing my mum (don’t ask!).
Domestic: To do some weeding (to those of you who have been kind enough to read my posts, I haven’t done the garden bench yet!!!).
Health: To enjoy my low fat eating plan - which keeps my cholesterol and weight down. To go for a 30 minute walk every day.
R & R: To enjoy some mindless TV. To carry on reading my supernatural, spine-tingly book. To cuddle the cats. To cuddle Mick (husband) regularly. To have a cuppa or two at my favourite cafés.
Challenge: To avoid eating that packet of Kettle crisps in the cupboard.
At the start of the week, it’s helpful to set your intent. What do you want to achieve in the broad spectrum of your life by this time next week? By doing an exercise similar to the above, you can check out where there are imbalances in your life in the week ahead – and hopefully redress them.
THE POTHOLE (20 AUGUST 2010)
Think of your life as a metaphorical road. There you are, walking down the road and suddenly you’re in a pothole. This is the pothole of your particular life experience e.g. choosing the wrong type of partner, feeling anxious when flying, behaving in a negative way with authority figures – whatever your problem and kneejerk reaction is. Out you get. You come down this road another 1000 times and each time you mindlessly fall into the pothole without even seeing it. Until you realize there is a problem.
There you are again, walking down this metaphorical road of life. You see the pothole before you get to it. There it is. You fall in. Again. Another 1000 times you see the pothole and fall into it. You see the possible problem and yet again down you go – until you realize there are solutions and that you can change your thoughts and behaviours.
There you go walking down the road, we laughingly call life. You see the pothole ahead of you. Yes! You walk towards it, slowing down. You stop and teeter on the very edge of the pothole. Oh no! You know what is coming but you can’t quite stop yourself from falling in. 1000 times more, you see it, you know it and yet you still fall in. Until you learn that you need to understand more and to make even more changes.
There you are walking down the road. You see the pothole in time. You slow down. You make the best choice with new thoughts and behaviours. This time you walk around. YES! 1000 times you see, make the best choice and walk around the pothole.
Until you realize you can choose another road without any potholes. The problem need no longer be there at all.
60-SECOND TRANQUILLISER (18 AUGUST 2010)
Thought we would have a practical post for today. So here we are, “The 60-Second Tranquillizer”.
This quick and easy breathing technique will bring about rapid relief when needed. Using positive thoughts activates the parasympathetic nervous system and helps you switch off your fight/flight reaction. It is the perfect solution to rapidly calm nerves, focus the mind and will help you think more clearly.
You can use this simple and powerful exercise whenever you feel worried or tense. One of the benefits of this exercise is that it can be done anywhere at any time. If you are sitting down and it is safe to close your eyes that’s fine, otherwise standing and with your eyes open is OK.
1 Say firmly and silently to yourself “Take control”.
2 Repeat “I can do anything I want to” and exhale slowly.
3 Inhale slowly through your nose and out through pursed lips, allowing the abdomen to soften and rise on the in-breath then deflate and return to normal on the out-breath.
4 Pause.
5 Slowly repeat this for 6-8 breaths over the minute with the out-breath being slightly longer than the in-breath.
6 Say to yourself each time “I am breathing in peace and exhaling tension”
7 Each time you exhale, make sure you relax your face, jaw, shoulders and hands.
If your symptoms persist, repeat this technique for 3-5 minutes until you feel calm and relaxed.
LOOK TO THIS DAY (17 AUGUST 2010)
As an extra to my last post:
Look to this day for it is Life –
the very life of Life.
For yesterday is already a dream
and tomorrow is only a vision.
But today well lived makes every yesterday a dream of Happiness; and every tomorrow a vision of Hope.
From the Sanscrit
SITTING WITH NOT KNOWING (16 AUGUST 2010)
Sometimes we consciously choose to engage with a period of personal growth and sometimes a period of personal growth is hoisted upon us by external events; redundancy, bereavement or a grown child leaving the nest for example. We might have been recently diagnosed with a progressive or terminal illness.
Uncomfortable emotions arise, strange mindsets present themselves. Our ordered life becomes disordered and that can be difficult to deal with. We try to “think” our way through the chaos in order to feel a measure of control. While it is important to intellectually understand what is happening, this shouldn’t be confused with trying to control what is happening. The process of sitting with not knowing or sitting with uncertainty is a crucial part of our healing. It allows what needs to be healed to be healed. Sometimes we can make sense of this. Sometimes we can’t.
How do we sit with not knowing? My hands-on experience recently has been to:
• stay with it
• breathe through it
• keep grounded
• stay in the moment
• separate out what is reality and what is monkey mind
• talk about it
• not allow myself to panic and grasp at the nearest solution
• write about it
• allow myself to feel vulnerable
• look after myself
• take it slow
• allow myself not to know
• be open
• trust
• allow the psychological and physiological feelings of uncertainty to be there without desperately trying to find a solution – as I read somewhere “to let the rain fall upon you without giving in to the urge to run for cover”
My “sitting with not knowing” challenge at the moment is connected with grieving for a father who has been absent for 99.9% of my life and who has recently died. There is much I don’t know about this process. Now I realize it doesn’t matter that I don’t know, I feel more relaxed (at the moment!).
Reading back over this post, I know I can touch the sanctity of sitting with not knowing on good hair days. Not bad for a Scorpio control-freak!!! Ooops. Sliding back – must find a book to read on this – surf the web – find an answer – monkey mind - what can I do – what can someone else do – gibber – run round – headless chicken - .
Seriously. How do you tend to think or behave when avoiding sitting with uncertainty? The better you can deal with it following some or all of the above tips, the greater the space for peace in your mind and heart.
WISE WOMAN TIPS FOR SERENITY (13 AUGUST 2010)
Inspired by Simple Abundance, by Sarah Ban Breathnach
Have you ever met a woman who radiated serenity and calm? Who seemed impervious to stress, taking everything in her stride? As the author of this wonderful book suggests, if you asked such a woman what her secret was, she would probably offer the following tips for living a stress-free life:
• Cultivate gratitude.
• Carve out an hour a day for solitude.
• Keep it simple.
• Strive for realistic deadlines.
• Never make a promise you can’t keep.
• Breathe - deeply and often.
• Move - walk, dance, run, and find a sport you enjoy.
• Eat only when you’re hungry. If it’s not delicious, don’t eat it.
• Be instead of do.
• Set aside one day a week for rest and renewal.
• Laugh more often.
• Luxuriate in your senses.
• Let Mother Nature nurture.
• Stop trying to please everybody. Start pleasing yourself.
• Don’t squander precious resources: time, creative energy, emotion.
• Nurture friendships.
• Approach problems as challenges instead.
• Honour your aspirations.
• Surrender expectations.
• Exchange security for serenity.
• Search for your authentic self until you find her.
Don't try and do all of the above. Just do whatever you can. Maybe its about taking a copy of the above and pasting it to the fridge or loo door and choosing to engage with one tip a day. Have a good weekend.
LAUREL’S KITCHEN CORNER: SOFT GINGER COOKIES (11 August 2010)
This recipe comes from Lilly Longman’s 100 Year Old Recipes (original Victorian and Edwardian recipes restored to modern day English).
4oz butter
3oz brown sugar
5oz flour
2 tablespoons syrup
1 teaspoon ginger
½ teaspoon crushed cloves
½ teaspoon baking powder
½ teaspoon of cinnamon
1 egg
Pinch of salt
Mix the butter and sugar to a cream, then add the syrup and egg. Mix well. Put the baking powder, ginger, salt, cinnamon and cloves into a cup with a little hot water and mix well. When cool, add to the cake mix and add the flour. Mix well to a stiff mix. Makes about 36 biscuits. On a baking tray drop teaspoons of the mix in blobs, not too close to each other. Bake in preheated, moderate oven until golden. If over baked, they will go crispy, so keep an eye on them.
MANAGING CHANGE AND CRISIS (9 August 2010)
The word “processing” well describes the organic steps we take when coming to terms with something. It is a way of moving through our thoughts, feelings and maybe actions, which reflects our inner journey. How we process shows itself in our physiological and psychological wellness. Equally the more we engage with our inner processes in general, the better we are able to manage in times of crisis.
For example, at the moment, I am processing my (lack of) relationship with my father and his funeral service which happened last week. It is an intense time on all levels. We had the blessing of staying deep in rural Norfolk which provided a soothing balm. The day before we went away, I wrote an open letter to Monty. 90 minutes later and copious, soggy tissues at my feet, I had wandered through a turbulent inner landscape of poop and released stuff which I wasn’t taking to the funeral service.
That night, I had a wowsy of an anxiety attack. Talking it through with my ever-patient husband, I realized that although I had allowed myself to experience sadness and loss, I had managed to completely avoid anger. Ooops! I realized that my anxiety was holding back a swathe of anger towards my father related to his behaviour when he was alive. In the process of “grieving”, I had been advised towards compassion and forgiveness for Monty. Indeed, he had much pain. Indeed forgiveness and compassion need to be woven into the blend of healing for him and me. However, denial of other states is not healthy. The anger isn’t to be dwelt in, but to be gone through, to be processed along with everything else.
What am I learning that I can share with you?
• To allow yourself time to process something difficult e.g. redundancy, divorce, a health issue, bereavement or some other change. It takes time for the different layers to make themselves known to you.
• Find appropriate support e.g. friends, family, therapist etc.
• Make your processes as conscious as possible. Externalize through writing, art, crying, talking, gibbering - .
• Allow yourself to think and feel what you do, not what you think you should. Go through your own landscape of processing, not someone else’s.
• Know that you will come through it all with a greater depth of understanding.
• If all else fails – eat a large packet of Kettle crisps and a bar of Galaxy chocolate!!!!!!!
A GAELIC BLESSING (4 August 2010)
This blessing has been included in the service for Monty, my father and is one for us all:
Deepest peace of the running wave to you.
Deepest peace of the flowing air to you.
Deepest peace of the quiet earth to you.
Deepest peace of the shining stars to you.
Deepest peace of the gentle night to you
May the moon and stars pour their healing light on you.
Deepest peace of the Light of the World to you.
The next post will be on Monday. A space now for healing. Speak soon.
5 INFORMATION PRODUCTS TO SELL IN YOUR WELLNESS PRACTICE (2 August 2010)
Ebooks
Ebooks come in all sizes, from short 10 pagers through to in-depth 50 page documents. For example, if you are a nutritionist, you might want to write about How to Tackle Obesity in Your Child.
Self-study course
Offer a workbook detailing how someone could self manage a condition.
Supported course
You could offer a short wellness course online (email) or distance (post).
DVD
You can make a how to DVD on a specific subject and sell it as online and offline to your clients. For instance about DIY foot massage or about Acupressure for Headaches and Migraine.
CD
For example, if you specialize in stress management techniques, why not create a short relaxation techniques CD and sell it online or you could create MP3 or WAV files to download. Add a booklet and you could sell the package to clients in your clinic.
THE GARDEN OF YOUR LIFE (30 July 2010)
There are places within the garden of your life where a beautiful plant, shrub or tree has grown with fervour. This is where a life experience has occurred and has left its gift of fulfillment or satisfaction of a challenge well met. But its life force now seems to have slowed. Maybe instead of being at the forefront of a busy garden or life, it needs a quieter, shadier space in the background to reflect. There it will find its roots again to stretch out in quiet honour of a job well done.
Or maybe a plant, shrub or tree has grown to fill the space and now needs to spread upwards and outwards. It needs to find higher ground or a sunnier spot. So, you move to make the change in your life and find new space in which to grow.
As you appreciate and celebrate your garden, you watch for ailments and disease. You want to nurture the garden of your life, so that all that grows is healthy and strong. This is how you need to look to your own mind and body and to care for yourself as you might care for your garden. When you see all is not well, you use the most natural and effective healing modalities you can. You understand that your garden, as with yourself, needs tender, loving care so that renewal can happen.
MY FATHER (28 July 2010)
My sister Denise and Jacob her son have just returned home after a few days with us. This time, the visit was made all the more poignant, by the work Denise and I did together on the funeral service for Monty, our father, who died last week. The relationship between my father and Denise and my father and me has been painful with very little real contact. While Denise and I are both Jewish by birth, Denise is an ordained Buddhist nun and my beliefs run to the pagan. Monty was Jewish but was a spiritual seeker in a wide sense. We have decided to have an Interfaith Minister facilitate the service, and Denise and I have created this service between us.
The experience of creating the service has been a unique one. Denise and I were both apprehensive (about each other) and how we would engage in this most difficult of activities. To create a funeral service for a significant person is both difficult and a blessing. In our Western society, we tend not to engage too much with death because of fear and yet this most profound of changes effects us all. Creating the service has helped me in my healing process. It hasn’t eradicated the grief, loss and resentment, but the process has softened the pain to allow brief shimmers of healing to enter. In the few words of this post, it is hard to encapsulate how engaging with death (in whatever way, to whatever depth) can heal. Maybe in posts to come, I can write more.
AMETHYST AND HERB DREAM PILLOW (26 July 2010)
• ½ cup chamomile dried herb
• ½ cup lavender dried herb
• ½ cup dried hops
• ½ cup rosemary dried herb
• 1 cup dried roses petals
• 1 tumbled amethyst quartz
• Jasmine, geranium or lavender essential oil
Mix dried herbs in an airtight container for 7 days. Choose your fabric (silk is a good choice) and cut it into two pieces about 6" by 11". Stitch three sides of the fabric together, so the wrong side is on the outside. Turn it inside out so the right side is on the outside. Fill a muslin bag with the dried herb mixture plus 5 drops of essential oil. Add 2 tsp of orris root as a scent fixative. Pop in the amethyst quartz. Make your pillow refillable and washable by stitching some velcro on the open end. Tie the bag with a ribbon. Slide the dream pillow inside your normal pillow. Sleep well and awaken refreshed.
HERBAL HONEY (23 July 2010)
Honey is anti-bacterial and a good immune booster. When infused with herbs, the benefits of the honey are amplified and the honey absorbs the healing components of the herbs.
Dried herbs from which to make your herbal honey: comfrey leaf, fennel seeds, lavender, lemon balm, lemon verbena, marjoram, oregano, peppermint, rose petals, rose hips, rosemary, sage, spearmint, thyme or cayenne pepper. If using garlic or ginger root, use fresh.
Use 1 tablespoon of fresh herbs, or half a teaspoon of dried herbs for every 2 cups of honey. Fill a glass canning jar (mason jar, ball jar, fruit jar) halfway with the herb you choose. Pour raw honey over the herb until the herb is covered and the honey rises to the top. Release any air bubbles. Cover the jar and store in the fridge for a few days before using. It will last one to two weeks or more. NOTE: If using fresh garlic use it whole. Allowing the herbs to infuse into the honey longer will strengthen the medicinal properties of the herbal honey.
To enjoy your herbal honey, place a tablespoonful (include herb as well as honey) into a mug, add boiling water; stir and drink. Or eat herbal honey by the spoonful straight from the jar to soothe a sore throat. Better yet, make some fresh bread and smear on liberally. Follow this with a nice cream tea – a pot of Earl Grey. Yep! That’s me sorted for the weekend then!
HOW TO MAKE AN AROMATHERAPY PERFUME BLEND (21 July 2010)
Essential oils are referred to as top notes, middle notes or base notes depending on their aromatic qualities.
Top note oils are stimulating, energizing and light with a fresh quality. Their aroma does not last long because they evaporate quickly. Examples of top note oils are: petitgrain, grapefruit, lime, lemon, bergamot, cinnamon, eucalyptus, lemongrass, neroli, orange, peppermint, pine, tangerine and verbena.
Middle note oils usually form the main part of aromatherapy blends. They are potent and strong. Their scent can be detected immediately after you get the impression of the top note. Examples of middle note oils are: melissa, chamomile, geranium, lavender, linden blossom, palma rosa and rosemary.
Base notes linger longest because they are the last to evaporate. Their scents are rich, heavy and full bodied, emerging slowly after the top and middle notes. They form the base of any blend. Examples of base note oils are: sandalwood, rosewood, vanilla, jasmine, cedarwood, frankincense, patchouli, rose and ylang ylang.
To make an oil-based aromatherapy perfume blend, ¾ fill a 10ml dark glass bottle with jojoba oil. Start with the base note, then the middle and finish with the top note oil. Put 15 drops of each oil in, shake the bottle and smell as you go. Once mixed, leave the blend in a dark place for about two weeks to mature, shaking once a day.
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